SHOPPING FOR A HUSBAND!

A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs.

The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up she goes.

The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.

The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" And up she goes again.

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking.

"Hmmm, better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?"

The fourth floor sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework.

"Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more further up!" And again she heads up another flight.

The fifth floor sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak.

"Oh, mercy me! But just think... what must be awaiting me further on?" So up to the sixth floor she goes.

The sixth floor sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 6,875,953,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Moyes Need to MAN-UP

There is no room for Manchester United manager David Moyes to hide.
There were doubts about his ability to manage one of the biggest sporting brands in the world after the retirement of Sir Alex Ferguson. After eight matches in the Premier League season Manchester United are the butt of all jokes.
I will admit that I was calm and trusted that he would be good enough for the job - am still confident that he is. However, the time has come for him to take the bull by the horns, get as tough as he can and basically "man up" at Man U.
All the first team players at Manchester United have Premier League winners' medals bar Fellaini and the young lad Janusaj, so they will need the manager to show them what new things he brings to the table. At Everton, David Moyes showed a lot of modern tactical play with his team and rarely ever set the team up in the old fashioned 4-4-2 formation that he inexplicably uses at Man United now. It is a formation that is so rare to see at any of the top clubs in Europe.
It is very difficult to make excuses for the United manager with regards to the transfer window, as he was appointed before the end of last season, resuming work on the 1st of July - the day the transfer window opened. It was extreme carelessness on his part that the club chased shadows all through the summer, managing only to sign Maroune Fellaini on deadline day. The club had engaged in fruitless searches elsewhere.
What is proving to be the most difficult situation for Moyes, which might prove pivotal in his success or failure at Man United, is the playing relationship between Wayne Rooney and last season's hero Robin van Persie.
As I pointed out above, very few teams play with a twin strike force but clearly Moyes wants to keep Rooney and Van Persie happy by playing them both from the start. It is not working. The midfield empties and is shorn of numbers, as opponents overwhelm the two United have there. This then dries up the supply to the strikers, making playing the two of them irrelevant.
Wayne Rooney had said that he fell out with Sir Alex last season because he was asked to play a lot in midfield. Never mind that, factually, it was falsehood, as he played most of his matches last season as a forward. The fact is that now he seems to want to just score goals. His body language is that of a man who only wants to add to his tally and will not be ready for anything else. Robin van Persie also only wants to score goals as he did so thrillingly last season.
David Moyes needs to ignore the selfishness of both his star forwards and think of the success of his team first, which is closely tied to his tenure at Old Trafford, in making the hard decision of dropping one of them. A decision like that will send out a message to all the players that he is not afraid to take hard decisions for the benefit of the team and players will then trust him more.
It needs to be reiterated that the desires of both players to be the number one striker for the club is not a bad thing. It is the effect of having both of them in tandem that is a problem. Someone might point out that City have two strikers but City play with midfielders who are brilliant.
Liverpool, Chelsea, Spurs and Arsenal make sure of their numbers in midfield to ensure territorial equality first, before going on to look for superiority in goals scored.
David Moyes has to sort the situation out pretty fast. He has the players to do it, his job is to present them with the right tactics for each match. It is embarrassing for a club the size of Man United to get a solitary point from two home games against WBA and Southampton.
The Premier League title race will run to the wire with so many teams to be involved to the end. The manager of the defending Champions David Moyes has to ensure he is part of the title race if he wants to have a job next season. It is that straightforward.

A VICTIM OF MATH

My feelings about Math (which are very negitive)

I've been going to school for a while now, and although I still don't like homework, by far the worst homework in whole universe in all it's eternity, is math. Doesn't matter what it is I hate it. Those four letters have continued to ruin my life ever since first grade. The only thing I ever remember about math is how much I hate it.
First of all who cares? If I wanted to know what x equal or the angles of a triangle, I would've figured it out on my free-time. I believe that four plus four or x equals whatever is a mystery that is best left alone. Plus, it's all confusing you do this and times it by this number and it magically becomes this number, which you then minus by this then times it by the other number and then you have plug it back into the equation and do it all over again. Honestly if any one wanted to torture me, make me do math. Or if someone said, "Do this algebraic function right or we'll kill you." I'd probably just say, "Shoot me now 'cause it'll be wrong."
My philosophy on math is this: Calculators do a darn good job of doing our math, I say we keep on letting them go at it, if someone wants to do math for fun, they can go ahead. (However, that person should probably be evaluated by a physcologist)
Fortunately I way to counter my math problem. God has given me a great gift that helps me greatly with my math homework. Creativity. How does this help? Well, let's say, hypothetical situation, I don't understand my math homework, (that whole "hypothetical thing was total sarcasm by the way) I'll just creatively make up my own way to solve the problem. It may not be right, but I got my homework done, besides that what re-dos and extra-credit are for. So say I have problem (which by the way are very fitting names, because in my life they are most definitely problems) I might add the four to the five which is nine and times that by the two to get x which is eighteen.
You may be thinking "Poor Child she doesn't know her algebra," but believe me I prefer it this way. This is the only way I have fun with math.
So that's how I feel about math. You may feel differently about it and that's okay, (even though I think you may need serious help if you do) but my blog is to write about how I feel. If you want to write about how amazing math is write your own blog. On this one "math" and "amazing" will never go in the same sentence, except that last one.

JOB VACANCY

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Uke Deadly Stampede: Should Gov. Obi Be Held Responsible?

The stampede at the Holy Ghost Adoration Ministry, Uke, in Idemili North local government area of Anambra State that left at least 30 people dead at the weekend, should be blamed on Governor Peter Obi for turning the house of prayer into a place of politics, the All Progressives Congress (APC) has said.

APC had in a statement signed by its Interim National Publicity Secretary, Alhaji Lai Mohammed in Lagos on Sunday, said had the Anambra governor and the unpopular candidate he is seeking to impose on people of the state, Willie Obiano, not gone to the praying ground to engage in wrongful politicking, the innocent souls that died at the vigil would still be alive today.
The party argued that while there is nothing wrong in a state governor attending a vigil, such visits should be communicated to organizers to enable them make proper security arrangements, and it should also not be a license to engage in political campaigns.
APC condemned the plan by Gov. Obi to set up a panel to investigate the stampede, considering the fact that he is integral to the entire tragedy.
“Setting up a panel to investigate the cause of the stampede will amount to seeking to be a judge in your own case. The only cause of the stampede is the Governor’s ill-advised visit to the vigil. Information at our disposal has it that the stampede was triggered by the Governor’s overzealous security details who manhandled congregants as their principal was exiting the venue of the vigil. The security details were said to have been irked by the murmurs of disapproval that greeted the Governor’s attempt to campaign for his candidate, Mr. Obiano.
“It is therefore disingenuous for the Governor’s spin doctors to be shifting the blame on the supporters of our candidate, Senator Chris Ngige. The simple truth is that there would have been no stampede if Gov. Obi had not come to the vigil or, even if he had come, had not attempted to politicize the gathering that was meant strictly for prayers,” APC said.

The party admonished Gov. Obi to take a cue from the disapproval that is trailing his desperate bid to impose a candidate on the state by ending all activities that can endanger the lives of Anambrarians.
“We recall that an angry protest also greeted the attempt by the APGA campaign train, with Obiano in tow, to shut markets in Onitsha last month. The protests effectively short-circuited the APGA campaign. Had the Governor and his entourage learnt their lessons from the Onitsha debacle, they would not have needlessly endangered the lives of the same people whose votes they are desperately but undeservedly seeking,” it said.
APC said Obiano’s candidacy is not worth the blood and tears of the good people of Anambra, hence Gov. Obi should desist from trying to impose an unpopular candidate on the people.
The party prayed God to grant repose to the souls of the departed, just as it wished all those injured in the stampede a speedy recovery and the families of the victims the fortitude to bear their losses.

NLNG Post-Graduate Scholarship Scheme 2014

Nigeria LNG Limited is pleased to call for applications from qualified candidates into the NLNG Post-Graduate Scholarship Scheme for entry into Masters Programmes in the United Kingdom in September 2014. The Scheme is administered by British Council Nigeria.

Criteria for Award
Potential beneficiaries must:

• be entering into a Masters programme in Engineering, Geosciences, Environmental Sciences, Management Sciences, Information Technology, Law and Medicine
• be Nigerian nationals resident in Nigeria
• provide identification documents from their L.G.A.s
• provide evidence that they are available to travel in September 2014 if selected.
• possess a 2 Class Upper degree in a relevant field of study
• have completed the NYSC programme
• be no more than 30 years of age

Method of Application 
Application forms for the scholarship can be downloaded by clicking here or visiting www.britishcouncil.org.ng Completed application form, along with an attached coloured passport photograph of applicant should be submitted via email to: nlngpgscholarship@ng.britishcouncil.org

Please do not attach any documents to the completed application form. Only application forms accompanied by a single passport photograph will be considered.

Applications into the Nigeria LNG Post-Graduate Scholarship Scheme will be received only via email; if you do not have regular access to the internet, you can download the form onto your personal computer and email it back after you have completed it.
Only applications sent to: nlngpgscholarship@ng.britishcouncil.org will be considered. Exceptions will only be given to applicants with ‘special needs’.

The Selection Process
Candidates whose applications are successful will be invited to sit for a test. On the basis of the results of the test, applicants will be invited for interviews from which the final selection will be made.
Please note that only those who make it into the various stages of the selection process will be contacted.
More information about the Nigeria LNG Postgraduate Scholarship Scheme can be found in the FAQ document here.

Application Deadline: Friday, 15th November 2013

My Pregnancy is not from Jim Iyke; I was asked to frame him - Nancy confesses

The alleged pregnancy saga involving actor Jim Iyke and the daughter of a Lagos businessman, Nancy is now taking a different dimension. When the story broke recently, many condemned Jim Iyke even without

giving him the benefit of doubt, but his woman, Nadia Buari, stood by him.
At last, the lady, Nancy has confessed and Jim Iyke too has reacted.
Nancy has opened up that some persons actually approached her to frame Jim Iyke up and cause confusion in his marriage-bound relationship with Nadia Buari.
She however refused to give details of her sponsor but she has dropped the allegation that they dated secretly and he that he got her pregnant.
On his part, Jim Iyke said his enemies will continue to fail:

BBM for Android & iPhone clocks up 20 million downloads

BlackBerry has revealed it has ditched the waiting lists for its BBM app for Android and iOS. Previously, users who wanted to use the app had to join a waiting list to be registered, but now it's a straightforward procedure. "Users can now immediately download, sign in and start using BBM without having to wait," said BlackBerry, in a press statement. BBM for Android and iOS hits 20 million user mark Drumroll please. This is the big one. BBM for iPhone and Android has hit a whopping 20 million new users (yes, we did just write 20 million) in its first week. Blackberry (or as it is now calling itself,#teamBlackberry) says it's "thrilled". In a blog post BlackBerry said, "Clearly, the momentum of BBM for BlackBerry, Android and iPhone continues to grow and while we are excited by the download numbers we saw this week, downloads do not speak to the way people interact with each other using BBM and we will now focus on active use of BBM – the connections being made and the conversations in which our BBM community engages." Congrats, BlackBerry. Get ready for BBM voice and video calls Ten million people have downloaded it already - and there’s more to come from BBM for iPhone and Android. Andrew Bocking, executive VP of BBM for Blackberry said yesterday that those with the app should be able to make voice and video calls within months. While Bocking has said that the app will always be free, the company are looking to monetise it, Phonearena notes. That means BBM channels, which Bocking calls a “social engagement platform within BBM” with targeted ads for users. As for BBM itself? “We continue to plan to evolve the service and keep making it more engaging and have more reasons why people will come back to use the service”, Bocking says. BBM for Android and iPhone nets over 10 million downloads on day one of release BlackBerry has revealed than in the first 24 hours since it launched BBM for Andorid and iPhone it has been downloaded more than 10 million times, in what the company describes as "one of the best single-day openings for a mobile app to date ." BBM achieved number one app status in the UK, US, Canada, Indonesia and "most of the Middle East," according to a BlackBerry statement. It also gained "overwhelmingly positive" user ratings on both Apple's App Store and Google Play with 60,000 five star reviews on Google Play. Andrew Bocking, BlackBerry's executive vice president of BBM, said, "This has been an incredible launch for BBM across Android and iPhone devices. The mobile messaging market is full of opportunity for BBM. We intend to be the leading private social network for everyone who needs the immediate communication and collaboration of instant messaging combined with the privacy, control and reliability delivered through BBM." He added: "While we’re excited to bring BBM to iPhone and Android – we aren’t stopping there. Work isn’t slowing down at all. We committed to delivering a BBM experience on iPhone and Android that was equal to that on BlackBerry 10. That means bringing BBM Video, BBM Voice and BBM Channels to Android and iPhone customers too. "My team is still committed to bringing those features to BBM on Android and iPhone in the near future. And we’re not stopping there – we have some great new features planned that will build on BBM as the private social network you count on for immediate conversations you can control and trust."

Tchidi Chikere moves in with Nuella Njubigbo as ex-wife finds love again

According to a new report by City People magazine this week, actress Nuella Njubigbo & Nollywood movie producer Tchidi Chikere have moved in together. Nuella, who has been dating Tchidi since before he divorced his actress wife Sophia Chikere, moved out of her Okota family home and moved into a new house with Tchidi at Graceland Estate in Ajah. The couple reportedly moved in together a few months ago and are still decorating their new home. After reading this report I contacted Nuella's people to confirm the story and they said they have no comment on the matter. Nuella is known to vehemently deny reports if not true, she ain't denying this. Meanwhile, Tchidi's ex-wife Sophia Chikere has also moved on. The mother-of-three is currently dating a UK based businessman. See their loved up pics after the cut...

BMW Scandal: Coscharis gave N112M kick back to aviation Minister

According to new reports by Sahara Reporters, the car company that sold the two BMW armored cars to NCAA, gave N112million to aviation minister Stella Oduah as kickbacks. (Kickback is a form of negotiated bribery in which a commission is paid to the bribe-taker for services rendered)

From Sahara Reporters

Even as the minister of aviation began a new spin today that the BMW armored cars purchased by the Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority (NCAA) for her use were done on "hire-purchase", SaharaReporters has unearthed new details about the $1.6 million spent by the Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority to purchase the armored BMW cars for Nigeria's Aviation Minister Stella Oduah.

A highly reliable source has told SaharaReporters that the shady deal for the car was done entirely between Coscharis Motors Limited, a dealership from which the cars were purchased, one of Ms. Oduah’s private firms based in Abuja, and First Bank of Nigeria.

“The NCAA was not even aware of the deal until the minister told them to sign that they had received two BMW cars,” said our source.

After inking the deal, Coscharis Motors, sellers of the highly inflated automobiles, reportedly gave the Aviation Minister more than N112 million as kickbacks. Our source added that Cosmas Maduka, who owns Coscharis Motors, pocked N60 million for each of the two BMW cars.

An official at the NCAA corroborated the information that the agency was largely kept in the dark about the transaction. “We were never privy to the transaction and had not seen the cars even though our head of transport was made to sign the delivery note,” said the source. The agency is under the Ministry of Aviation.

The source added that the agency has still not seen the cars even after the scandal escalated.

SaharaReporters was first to break the news that Ms. Oduah compelled a cash-strapped NCAA to pay for two extravagantly priced bullet-proof BMWs f

or her personal use. After initially denying our reports, the minister’s spokesman, Joe Obi, admitted that the transaction transpired. Mr. Obi alleged that the purchase was justified because of unspecified threats to the minister’s life. Neither Mr. Obi nor the minister has provided proof of any threats to Ms. Oduah. The minister has not addressed why the NCAA paid a price tag that auto dealers in the US and the UK described as a rip-off. US dealers said that each of the BMW cars should cost no more than $$167,000.

Last week, an official of the NCAA, Fola Akinkuotu, spoke to the media and defended the purchase of the cars. Mr. Akinkuotu said the cars were for the ministry’s protocol pool for use in transporting foreign aviation dignitaries when they visit Nigeria. His explanation conflicted with the original statement by the minister’s spokesman, Mr. Obi. A source at the NCAA disclosed that Mr. Akinkuotu felt tricked into facing the media on the scandal. “He had been told he would only appear beside the embattled minister, who was supposed to speak. Instead, he was asked to speak,” said the source.
Meanwhile, a source at the Presidency said President Goodluck Jonathan was unfazed about the fraud perpetrated by Ms. Stella Oduah, his Aviation Minister. Ms. Oduah and the late former National Security Advisor, General Owoye Azazi, had played significant roles in raising and disbursing money to rig the 2011 presidential elections for Mr. Jonathan.  Mr. Jonathan will depart Abuja tomorrow on a weeklong pilgrimage to Israel.

However, SaharaReporters learnt that several ministers and diplomats have registered their displeasure at Mr. Jonathan’s continued retention of Ms. Oduah on his cabinet.